Oprah recently did a Lifeclass with Greg Behrendt and his wife Amiira Ruotola about dating myths. Behrendt is the author of the book He’s Just Not That Into You, and they have just co-authored a book called It’s Just A F***ing Date. Their no nonsense approach to dating is designed to put women in control and help them to stop feeling as they have to alter themselves in order to find the right guy. Of course, I will admit that all of the talk about single-dom generally revolves around what women are doing wrong. We talk too much, we reveal too much, we don’t make guys wait, we’re not vulnerable enough, etc. Then everything guys are doing wrong is chalked up to “they’re just guys.” I resent this dating conversation, because it takes two to tango. However, one thing that I did like about the class is the part of the discussion about the ways mobile and digital communication have changed dating. A discussion was sparked between the men and women in the audience about texting. Text messages allow us to fall into vague, bad communication patterns with the person we’re dating without risking anything as we over analyze everything. I personally hate texting people I do not know well. I think that until you know someone’s speech pattern, word choices, and tone of voice, texting them is a bad idea. You end up over analyzing everything they type and texts between strangers often come off as curt and snarky. As a single person whose dating life is about as alive as pine trees in the Sahara, I was happy to see that I am not the only one who finds courting through text awkward and impersonal.
Tags: dating, Greg Behrendt, He's Just Not That Into You, It's Just A F***ing Date, Lifeclass, Oprah's Lifeclass